I hope you have a really shitty weekend. I love you.
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
fyi, if youre wondering if offering a female police officer sexual favors will get you out of a ticket, the answer is no.
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
The first clue should've been that he literally had shit in his hair. How does that even happen?
I have never smelled more like a drunk mariachi band than I do right now.
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it.
You're too drunk for my bullshit, and i'm too sober to put up with yours. I have no idea how you expect to find middle ground here.
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
She rode me wearing nothing but a Santa hat. Merriest fucking Christmas!
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
thank god my bra was in my purse... were all good
Best part though was when he wanted to cuddle and I was like, I'm going to go.
Randomize
