Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
please stop telling ppl youre Alice Cullen when youre drunk
he's having a long distance Facebook-coordinated power hour. the status update has 159 comments ...
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
Last night he tried to put me in their garbage can and then sprayed me with a fire extinguisher in their kitchen...that house is always interesting
we did it on the golf course and he threw the condom in the pond. some poor fish is gonna choke on it
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
FACT: the parking lot attendant was yelling "NO SEX HERE! NO SEX" at yall.
I think I found out what we're going be for Halloween....Alcohol poisoning victims.
I have a diplomatic trade for you. My pants for your rum. Tomorrow?
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
I can't believe you tried to cock block me from A DIFFERENT TIME ZONE.
OMG. When you threw the used condom on your floor you threw it in my purse!!! I just went to grab my headphones and it was stuck to them!
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