I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
I will make out with the first guy who tries to pick me up with a lyric from a rap song. I won't even reply, just be on him like whoa.
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
Haha he acted like he's never seen a tampon catapolt across the hall before
The only good thing about trampolines when you're fucked up is the gushing blood really cleans all the bad coke out of your nose.
I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
I know I should be focused on nurturing their bright little minds but it's 10 a.m. and I need a cock in my mouth
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
Dont act like I'm the only one that gets on a plane and picks out the one im gonna have fuck if we have time before the crash
I peed in a 7/11 last night. Like literally pretended I pretended I was shopping, looked around, and peed on boxes in the corner. No more tequila
ugffhh I have work in 4 hours and have recieved zero sleep, seeing that I'm trapped in the arms of a snoring bear man. can't. breathe. lost in the forestry of his chest hair.
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