i had just passed the point of no return when my mom opened my door. I hid my dick and took the porn off the computer in time but i still had to explain my day at school to her WHILE i was jizzing in my pants.
I don't understand how he can't hear himself snoring, but he'll wake up to me sneaking m&m's from my junk food stash beside the bed...
I passed out and woke up with my pockets full of Lucky Charms cereal and chocolate coins. Another successful St Pattys Day.
My parents foreign exchange student just walked in on me whacking off. Welcome to America :)
dream priorities were more important than voting today. don't tell me you wouldn't keep going back to sleep to find out who would win a fight between oprah and godzilla
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
The magic cards should have been the first clue. The comments that I have "amazing birthing hips" and that I'm "beautiful in a child bearing sort of way just sealed his fate.
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
I'd marry him just to keep his penis in the country
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
Of course I'm watching space shows while stoned on the science channel. Why would I want to learn while not baked out of my skull?
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
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