i want you now
you need to stop dating girls with the same name as your mother...or stop drinking so much...I don't want to see this
when we woke up the fish was dead lying next to us on the bed. wat should i tell her
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
It was a taxi full of fist pumps and chanting to "face down, ass up". It was that 1% that makes my job worth it.
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
I thanked him for the booty call offer but told him I'd rather just do it myself
Just give me 5 advils and some sunglasses and I'll knock out on this couch no problem.
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
For the record you're an amazing lay and you have great taste in breakfast sandwiches
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
I need a significant other who'll eat Skittles from my boobs
Randomize
