I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
I'll let you put expensive food in me, but really, not much else.
we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
so I woke up this morning and on their fridge, the first item on the shopping list was my virginity.
we gave some random guy a shot for shoveling our sidewalk.
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
Bad news: I found out that girl you want has a boyfriend. Good news: she'll probably cheat on him with you. Better news: after seeing the way she treats him, that's the most interaction you're going to want with her anyway. Trust me.
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
The wizard has you scheduled for a 6am sex breakfast
I'm so there
Cleaning naked can be dangerous. Vacuum cord got stuck on my belly button ring...
She's officially a Tinder poltergeist.
I just remembered that before we left my house I vowed to stay fully clothed and I FAILED
I just got offered free tattoos if I smuggle some guns from OKC to Dallas for a guy in the hells angels
Randomize
