Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
she would only give me a road handjob because she didnt want to unbuckle
safety first
He said he's gonna start calling me "Benny" because we're "friends with bennyfits"
What's your middle initial? I need it for the census. I put us down as "unmarried partners."
Oh my god... you're gay. Ps, its A.
No no. According to the 2010 US Census, we're gay.
just got passed by a van of kids watching the little mermaid. debating speeding so i can watch
Didn't u have court just yesterday for ur driving?
IT'S THE LITTLE MERMAID! totally worth another year of probation
I'm calling into work with a wicked case of sledge hammer crotch. She has to understand
I know I'm her Sunday school teacher. I just feel I would be saving others from a lot of headaches by telling her someday she's going to be a stripper
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
I just want to let you know that when you try and lie about the "solid 10" you brought home last night, I've got a picture of her and about 10 reasons you should have left her at the bar starting with those martin scorsese eyebrows.
Can I come over? I respect you, but I want disrespectful things to happen
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
He played with my boobs the whole time we watched Scott Pilgrim and then started invited others to play with them too. It reminded me of how my mom gives out my french fries without asking.
ok, i suppose pissing your pants could be considered a wardrobe malfunction.
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
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