yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
He toold me that when we were younger I was his boner buddy.
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
I just bought 1/2 a fifth of vodka out of an old school baby carriage from a homeless man. Gotta love this city.
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
And there might be a gallon of sangria without the lid on the floor in your room. Just be careful when you open the door.
After a couple hours you decided you were going to walk home but ten minutes later you called and said you'd puked by the side of the road and you needed us to drive you to the art museum.
I just bought emergency deodorant at Dominick's and put it on in front of a homeless man while waiting for the bus. He laughed and said 'girl, you a mess'. This is my life.
I mean, I already put pants on today. We're already halfway there
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
A hefty woman and I mean hefty shoved her number in my pocket at the gym without as much as a hello, winked and kept walking. Going to use your bed to defile her, don't want her to know where I live or have my neighbors see! Thanks, you're a pal!
I'm eating shredded cheese and chugging coke, until I can function again. I'm tingling everywhere
I learned the hard way a garbage bag will not save you when jumping from a tree at 2am
The neighbors ahemed the WHOLE time. Their kids are the ones that scream loud enough for me to remember my birth control. It's payback!
Randomize