would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
i just cleaned out my toilet because i knew that my head would be in it later
Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
long story short: there's a file in the master file cabinet labeled "lube".
This is how I ended up being the slutty friend isn't it?
You called me 32 times last night just to tell me you felt a heartbeat in your vagina?
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
don't care how drunk i am. my dick was like "nope, not doing it, you can't make me and i was like oh yes i can"
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
Bro you fell face first into the sand and then balled up into the fetal position and yelled help untill I picked you up, no more whiskey for you...
So glad I can hide money in my wallet and drunk me is too stupid to find it. Hangover sushi ftw.
May have told my history professor I wanted him to stuff me like a turkey. Too slutty?
Nah, people appreciate the creativity of seasonal sluttiness. Let me know if it works!!!
She called and said she was waiting for me naked. I got there and she was in ratty sweats, sitting in Nick's lap, with divorce papers. Needless to say my night was shitty.
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