Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
That point of drunk where you're in a bar bathroom and you're like "F*ck you bra! I'm not taking your sh*t anymore! and you take it off and throw it in a trashcan.
Ya he's the booze devil, like if the black hole and Bermuda triangle joined forces with Captain Morgan
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
I wasn't an ass in college so much more like I showed my ass a lot especially during serious beerpong games. You know I don't fuck around when it comes to sports.
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
You told me to keep you from drinking, but we both know I'm not that kind of friend.
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
Are you still free tonight?
Oh shit I kinda forgot and took acid
Got home and told boyfriend what happened. He was like "you made out with a guy you call Balls Deep?" and hi-fived me.
Is it appropriate to send an apology gift to his roommates for breaking the bathroom sink during crazy sex?
Doing the walk of shame from the back of a Jeep to the porta potty it's parked next to while your dad watches is not what you want.
I woke up next to my bosses toilet.i wish you had just left me in the neighbors yard.
Randomize
