I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
I should take him calling me "a freak of nature" after sex as a compliment, right??
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
I'm glad you trust me to be your sex stat keeper.
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
Eating my shrimp pasta on the porch with a 40, wearing a Hawaiian shirt, proclaiming "I GOT SCRIMPS." I just jumped the shark of college.
His daughter is our waitress. I left her a ten dollar 'I'm sorry I'm a whore and fucked your dad' tip...
What's a good pandora station to masturbate to?
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
There was blow residue on my chem book and my TA was like, did u stain your notebook with CaCO3?
Who showers for four hours?!
It was like a tropical nap.
Don't patronize me, I thought of that on peyote, so it was basically like a message from God.
you know you need to get laid when: getting wrestled to the ground in a self-defense class turns you on....p.s. this is a booty call
I'm too hungover to Google him and try to save face.
Randomize
