Unless I'm getting a singing midget telegram, I'm not going to smile
You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
Just saw a guy doing jumping jacks at the gym. I don't even have to create a punch line for that
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
Ask him about a girl named Meg then give a disappointed and disapproving face.
I worked so hard to shave everything last night. EVERYTHING. He WILL be answering my phone calls. Otherwise he's passing up awesome random birthday sex.
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
your girlfriend showed us your homemade porn last night.
She acted like falling "up" the stairs was a fucking physics phenomenon. I call that Tuesday nights.
This is either going to be a hilarious catfish or the fuck trophy of the century.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
Before making travel and hotel reservations to meet your "affair" for the first time, consult your menstrual calendar! $633 wasted!
Randomize
