U r making out with a 12 year old get ur shit together
Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
My foreign exchange student got here today. I turned on man vs. food and told her that "this is all you need to know about America."
theyre doing DJ Khaled impressions again...
I only have two new blunt burns this year as opposed to freshman year's 6. This is growing up.
Is asking my 8-year-old brother if he will make us shot glasses in his ceramics class too far?
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
Besides the fact that the only male who has shown an interest in me in the last 5 months has a strange and unfortunate resemblance to fucking Frodo, I've been good thanks
He yelled "HOO-ah!" like Al Pacino when he pulled down his pants. Trust me, he has every right to.
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
Bank just called....we left my debit card in the ATM last night.
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
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