this other lifeguard and I are actually considering paying a kid to shit in the pool
Are you for fucking real.? He divorced me just because he got a fucking girlfriend.?!
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
Just spent 15 minutes trying to save the life of a fruit fly that dive-bombed my coffee. I figured it doesn't make sense to let two souls die in this place...
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
Bro I am trying to have one night stands nothing more, unless she is baking waffles I can eat out of her butthole I am not interested
Seriously, I want to give you a plaque thanking you for your dedicated service to my vagina.
NOT EVEN KIDDING RIGHT NOW. THE GUY IN THE SPIDERMAN COSTUME JUST FELL OFF THE ROOF INTO A BABY POOL. GET HERE NOW!!
DON'T PUKE iN THE PRINGLES CAN, WHATEVER YOU DO!
I have just found the cubicle of sustenance. And I will rejoice at all the families that have not found this magic. This vodka cubicle of magic.
It's not safe here. I had urgent and violent diarrhea last night, and I got blackout drunk. Please don't come over.
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
He's a fucking ninja- think of the things he can probably do with his dick.
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
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