The hardest part of getting a new computer is deliberating whether to start the cycle of porn and viruses all over again.
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
the fucking easter bunny is here. he just made 3 cups in a row. no one knows who he is..
While at warped tour today a girl was crowd surfing and her vagina landed in my face, I call that a successfull day.
buying new sheets for when my mom visits. I can't in good conscious let her use the ones from last night
And all I wanted you to do is stand there and sing who let the dogs out.
Sudden memory flashback: drunk me outside ripping my tampon out and throwing it into the neighbors yard, silently cheering 'time for sexxxx'. I sense a dangerous pattern emerging
You looked up at me and said "I'm getting a mattress made out of this SHIT. Goodbye certa hellllllllo concrete!" then you started counting sheep
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
I swear I can't go out anymore. It's like he put a GPS in my dick. I don't know if I should feel awkward or proud...
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
He just compared our sex to a grand slam on Wii fitness
You're doing it right
what is considered shitting yourself?
Like my underwear wasn't soiled, but there was definitely a departure from my asshole.
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
Legit hope my Trump humping Brother dies of this shit so I can stop pretending to still love him.
Randomize
