You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
At any point in time, have you stopped and thought "I wonder how high Willie Nelson is right now?
We couldn't find any ping pong balls, so we used a fishing bobber. Could we be more country?
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
I woke up with cheeseburger in my mouth and a deep sense of accomplishment.
Btw, whenever you feel discouraged about your life, think about me being frantically upset bc my mobile porn site limited me to only 5 videos a day
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
Your lack of dedication to alcohol is forcing me to drink with my ex husband. U suck
I'm taking a leave of absence and sending myself to fat camp. I'll let you know when I'm out.
I wish I'd realized he looked like Skrillex before I was already in the middle of fucking him...
I had sex on the roof of the dorm last night ... I feel like a combination of spiderman and van wilder
thank you for being a reason not to completely check out of my life and start sleeping all day, crying all night, and living off vodka acquired through credit card debt
I'm sure there's been a weekend in 2014 we were sober... Clearly it wasn't fun, bc I can't recall it. Point proven, alcohol is key.
I swear she is the Mary Poppins of drugs
Just fantasized about my boss's fingers in a meeting. I desperately need to get some.
Randomize
