oh. my. god. the guy i hooked up with last night is currently wearing a dress.
Sorry I couldn't get my dick out
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
Today should be called shooting fish in a barrel day. Every place ive gone to ive met a girl who regrets not hooking up last night. There have not been girls this easy since Fathers Day
every time fb tells me a dude i fucked is now friends with another dude ive fucked, i die a little inside. thats way more honesty than im comfortable with.
Sorry for trying to give you my dresser last night. Are any of the drawers still in your car?
the doctor said its the kinda of pregnant you dont recover from
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
My roommate was being an ass so I put everyone's drinks/shots on his tab for the entire night. Then when we left he was telling me how he got out cheaper than last time.
Give me an out of order sign and caution tape and we can have sex practically anywhere.
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
Is using La Croix as a mixer for vodka a legit way to reach my daily water consumption?
It went from a "chill game of beer pong" to "absinthe body shots and a tits parade" in literally two minutes.
Told you inviting her was a good idea.
You spilled your drink, and we laughed so hard my boobs popped out of my shirt.
Randomize
