Can Purell be used as lube?
its been so long since i'vebeen laid i've forgotten what a penis looks like. When a guy makes me hot i picture him finishing the job by whipping a multi-setting showerhead out of his pants.
I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
you kept begging me not to tell anyone you had been a bat in another life
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
He wanted me to blow him while he did curls and looked at himself in the mirror. Not sure if gay or ego maniac.
Watching the Walking Dead, snuggled up naked, and drinking a beer. No better way.
If ever there was a tweet to describe your life, it's this.
This isn't good. I can't find my mom. This is why we don't give her Fireball.
Hey I need you to run the morning meeting, for reasons I can explain when I find out where I left my car
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
I think my stomach is breaking up with me. It's giving me back everything I ever gave it.
hey i'm sure you are probably asleep bc you suck and think sleep is necessary to live or something?
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