my mario cart skills improve with alchohol. and i think my real car skills do to but the cop didnt see my logic
Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
my dad brought home flowers.. so i started talking to them
Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
Who would win... a chainsaw pooping pterodactyl or a bear with machine guns for feet. big debate about this right now
She was trying to fuck the exchange student from France. His English is really bad and the music was loud so she just pointed to a beer bottle and then her vagina.
You went to the animal party as a hoodrat. You won the most creative costume contest.
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
A dozen fresh-baked cookies delivered to my dorm AND I don't have chlamydia or gonorrhea... Could this night get any better??
Tinder has really served to stimulate the number of sex related demons summonings.
Your shit was massive.
I'm not 100% sure how to respond to that.
If you were in a "who has the massivest shit contest", you'd win by a landslide.
Randomize
