I ride home in a shopping cart. Don't at like you aren't jealous.
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
We were squawking at each other for over an hour like chickens. Literally. Never touching the stuff again and never again showing my face at that Denny's.
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
I wish they could condense everything I needed, nutritionally speaking, into mike and ikes
I figured out why her friends always say g is for god when she leaves with someone. She wears a double g cup bra
Seriously, don't even. "Hi, have I seen you half naked covered in bright red body paint on the internet?" is NOT acceptable water-cooler chit-chat.
Aw.
I thought I'd never say this, but if I had to choose between these cookies and sex, it would be these cookies
Are you ok?!
I assume I've stopped bleeding because I haven't passed out, but can't verify currently.
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
no offense but you looked like shit yesterday
tequila is unforgiving..
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
Its like he got lessons from Jesus on how to use his tongue. And his dick.
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