i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
I woke up naked by my window. blinds open. smiley face drawn on my window.
jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
I wouldnt consider it a good Wednesday if there wasn't any projectile vomit involved
i just added no after every hockey player in my phone..
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
Do you ever feel like a plastic bag?!
I'd like to stay optimistic, but I have this nagging suspicion my penis is in for a disappointing holiday weekend.
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
I'm currently giving my drug dealer relationship advice. He's a nice guy and all but I'm really just hoping I get some free weed
He talked me out going to the bar. No one ever talks me out going to the bar..this is fucking love.
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
like sometimes I wish I was allergic to latex so I wouldn't have sex with so many people..
Randomize
