sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
She said she didn't have time to shave "there"
Then she shouldn't have had time to order the lobster.
You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
He looked at me like he has never had a girl throw up on him before.
I'm considering telling her about my dream where I made a sex tape with her boyfriend. you know to test our friendship
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
Wait..I think something else did happen last night my vagina is too pleased for this level of hangover..
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory
You're more than welcome to join us! There's red velvet cake and apparently my pants are open for business I didn't consent to this
I just almost caught my floor on fire, then decided I could put it out with my knuckles! So I'm doing good!
found one of my socks in the dishwsaher... xanax
Get off the floor, put away the cookie dough, get ur shit together Scott.
You just kept yelling "you ain't got no pancake mix." to the tv screen
Randomize
