I made out with a fat chick last night in a hot tub... btw I am breaking up with you
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
you will always have a special place in my vag
I'm not a creep or anything, just a lost soul looking for a good lay
Oh so it was one of those "I shouldn't have gotten in a cab with a random 21 year old girl" kinda nights.
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
I had to assert my dominance as Alpha Drunk.
I definitely think in addition to buying paint ball guns this summer we should invest in a breathalyzer. That way every drunk night turns into a competition, who can blow over the legal limit more. The loser gets shot while hungover. Shit goes hand in hand if you ask me.
Your brother slept on my deck. There was a key under the mat. Relapse party success.
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
But of course I'm in. After all, what fun would the holidays be without trying to find the perfect gift to impress someone you've never met, but need the approval of??
He asked if I had any questions. Apparently, "how thick is the stick up your ass" was not a correct question.
He showed up with a hearse full of beer and is currently shooting pumpkins with a flare gun. Who gives a shit if he's a furry. We need to party with him more often.
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Randomize
