This girl I work with, who is 18 btw, invited me to her baby shower. Do they sell abortions in gift certificate form?
im sober playing flip cup. its like cheating.
I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
someone needs to make a hangover cure that isn't cocaine.
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
Let's enter the circle of trust. Are we there yet? Ok. If I somehow hypothetically slept with Amandas ex husband...on a scale of one to ten...how bad is that?
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
We've been here for ten minutes. She told me I wasn't "Irish enough", licked my tits, and then sprinkled green glitter on them.
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
I accidentally told my mom "the reason I didn't answer your call is because my phone was in my pants, on the floor"
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
Wake up. Finish House of Cards. Put on pants.
Accurate.
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
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