You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
Somebody spraypainted a transformers head on a transformer box..my life is complete
You were petting your shoe and saying this makes me really happy
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
I've started grabbing my boobs in front of my lesbian philosophy professor so she'll give me a better grade. It's working...
He just walked into my room in a robe with a cooking pot of cereal.
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.
Apparently he's taking the slut he cheated on me with on a cruise for her birthday. THAT COULD HAVE BEEN ME. TITANTIC STYLE.
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
The sun and I are not on speaking terms this morning
He wants me to fart in his mouth and is offering me SOOOO much coke. I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. GIVE ME ADVICE.
His wife just cheated on him for the third time. I'm his first extra-marital fling, that makes it ok, right? You know to keep karma balanced in the universe
Your logic is flawless...
Randomize
