they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
He told me he wanted to break up so he could get "closer to God."
Does God suck his dick?
I gave the naked guy in the hotel hall a pop tart. He stopped crying.
Apparently I yelled "no stop it" in my sleep last night when he tried to cuddle with me.
Oops, guess its official. I just use him for sex.
I am going to MURDER whoever gave him my phone number but it was probably drunk me so I'm conflicted.
Pandora was on point with the sex music tonight
He made a deal with his real estate agent called fucking in 50 properties for sale
For the record you're an amazing lay and you have great taste in breakfast sandwiches
We need to step in, this can't continue. The guy she went home with last night looked exactly like Count Olaf, right down to the unibrow.
Which version tho, Jim Carrey or Neil Patrick Harris?
THAT DOESN'T FUCKING MATTER, YOU DON'T FUCK COUNT OLAF!!!
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
She's currently singing "I'm gonna keep on lovin you" to her pillow. How do you think tonight went?
You kept singing "your gonna lose that girl" to him right in front of her.. of course you got punched in the face.
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
Randomize
