North Korea, Best Korea!
No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
I KNOW you don't honestly think you can pay me back in lotto tickets.
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
But on the up side she uprooted a whole peony plant from the hotel downtown and said, "I brought you flowers"
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn
The things i do for you...I put all those condoms on a bed, complete with girl, and you sleep in the bathroom
She just asked what would happen if you put a vacuum in your butt and turned it on. These are our conversations.
I watched Morgan Freeman explain the existence of nothing, now I'm afraid of sub - atomic particles. these egg rolls are outstanding
I want to share a beverage of the alcoholic category with you, but I'm conflicted about getting out from under my covers.
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
Dude, you stalking his LINKEDIN profile will NOT affect your chances with him. We aren't 40...
Had to take him to the ER for not only alcohol poisoning but for stepping on a firecracker. Happy 4th holy fuck
So if your sore it's because you tried to tackle a tree last night. When I told you at the party, you said "What do you expect, I'm an athlete!"
Randomize
