jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
i'm dressed up like the coppertone baby and being hit on a guy in a monk costume. the irony is not lost on me.
The difference between what I would do for a regular Klondike bar and an Oreo flavored Klondike bar is astounding
We almost died tonight..we almost die every night. but tonight was the closest by far
This has been the biggest binge-drinking season of the decade.
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
All hell broke loose. When the police showed up, this kid somehow haggled with a cop to let him pee in public. I'm convinced he could talk the panties off of a nun
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
Wearing rip off pants to a booty call last night was one of my most brilliant ideas ever.
My vibrator looks like a lipstick tube. So does my mace. I just realized the potential problems of keeping them both in the same bag.
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
Id prob hit it, but i instagram edited her picture to make her look better. Ha. She should fuck me just for that.
I did a kegel this morning to determine if I had been penetrated during last night's blackout. Nope.
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
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