She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
i had to pay fifty dollars for throwing up in the limo, 60 fucking dollars to throw up all over myself
i just remembered the time you guys tried to give me an intervention because i was drunk before 5 on a monday
on the way to the hospital you kept asking if we could stop at the bar first. then you proceeded to puke out the window
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
A girl pulled up next to me at a stoplight just now, looked around for a second, and then changed her top, bra and all, before the light turned green. New. Hero.
TAing a class of 300 froshies and being so hungover I forgot a bra is my way of making dreams come true.
Lemme guess, I was the one completely shit faced making out with the 50 year old...
LOL, wrong number bro. Good luck trying to figure out what happened though..
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
Would it be inappropriate to trade Christmas cookies for sex?
well i don't NEED my liver but it's nice to have one when you're trying to have a good time
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
I DONT WANT YOUR DICK. I WANT BRUNCH.
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