You're pretty and everything..but you aren't worth the DUI
why is it whenever you puke in the park there are always little kids on the swings?
You told the bartender you needed 2 beers, and a shot of his cum...
if you don't go out with us, what are you gonna do? you're gonna go home and watch biodome and masturbate to texts from your east coast boyfriend and see the facebook pictures from the party when you wake up.
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
Did we both pass out talking about cake last night?
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
Apperanlty I was screaming "It's hard to swim with a broken ankle sir" and then tackled the lifeguard. The joys of blackouts
You were so drunk you coat checked your shoe... Not even both of them. Just one shoe.
He asked me the next morning if he fell asleep inside of me. Drunk is an understatement.
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
You make me want to do things that I'm pretty sure are illegal.
It smells like graded cheese and febreze in the family room what the hell have you been up to???
Do you remember what happened last night? All I could find we're phone numbers of strip clubs in Detroit. Did we go to Detroit?
Randomize
