hey babe thanks for tonight, it was fun.
to be honest, i wanna fuck your friend.
Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
when I sang my humps to you I meant it.
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
I feel like I'm on let's make a deal. should I go with what's behind bulge number 1 or bulge number 2?
They were picking gravel out of my face for an hour. I think I took more out of the road than the road did of me.
Barfights against pavement aren't genrally won by people. Props.
We lost a condom inside me, I had to fish it out. The next day he gave me a Gone Fishin' bumper sticker. True love at its finest.
We tried to make ramen in a glass bowl on the stove. They called facilities to pick the glass out of the door
Done deal I'm dying it right at this moment. I'll need a red Speedo and a half shirt that is extremely tight. Like nipple tight.
I walked into my house with my pants inside out, no shoes and a limp. My mom asked me if I had fun but I passed out before I could reply...
He's super sweet. I feel like I'm dating Elmo. If Elmo had a 7 incher
You're only young once, and once you get old, you either regret all the sex you had, or you regret not having enough.
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
Did you apologize to him for the trip to the strip club as a first date or is that something that just gets swept under the rug??
Randomize
