I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
As it turns out, strippers don't accept checks.
I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
She's the barista slut.
LOVE ME LIKE A KANGARO LOVES A POUCH YOU DUMB CUNT
This old guy just saw me toking on my bubbler before I go to the dentist. He gave me the nod.
IT IS CHRISTMAS EVE AND I AM SUPPOSED TO BE HAVING SEX WITH AN ATTRACTIVE BLACK MAN IN THE NEXT FEW DAYS AND I JUST GOT MY PERIOD. WHEN PEOPLE ASK ME WHY I DON'T BELIEVE IN GOD I WILL TELL THEM OF THIS DAY.
And then I told him since the day he walked away to get over what I went through he lost the boyfriend right to ask why my bed is broken.
I take full pride in being the one that broke ur bed. Want to go for the sofa?
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
Bro you fell face first into the sand and then balled up into the fetal position and yelled help untill I picked you up, no more whiskey for you...
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
Okay, yeah, judgmental guy at 7/11. I'm buying g wine at 10:20 in the morning. You wanna fight about it?
I'm getting paid to get fucked up. How much better could this get?
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