Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
I just went to a chocolate syrup wrestling party I think you need to get on my level
I feel so much closer to you now that I heard your poop splash into the toilet.
her night didn't end so well, both of her boyfriends got arrested... together.
I'm soaked in champagne. I'm eating oatmeal from mcdonalds tonight was glorious
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
I spent part of my valentines extracting candy hearts from a woman's vagina. The entire time I was thinking "this job pays for my Mercedes. This job pays for my Mercedes. This job pays for my Mercedes."
Hey. I can't work your space dryer so I'm wearing your blanket home. I'll get my clothes later. Fun party!
You screamed "show me a dick stand!" But before I could ask you wft that was you had passed out in the corner
She flashed them and they let her pay with Monopoly money. I'm married, so it is your obligation as my best man to repeatedly fuck her for me
I gave his daughter swim lessons and in exchange he sold me an ounce. I feel so accomplished.
Nah, i wasn't offended. Having a bridesmaid who you had had multiple threesomes with your future husband would be weird.
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
Randomize