Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
So I have exactly 420 dollars saved up in tips from the past week. I win, and I take that as a sign from god that I am allowed to use that money to buy drugs.
a pedometer??? no beatles?Steve jobs just took a dump in CA and it landed on my heart
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
well what she called a "work function" most people call "doing shots with your boss while people throw napkins at you."
Where was your thought process?
Drowning in my hangover.
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
No. I'm laying on the floor naked. I almost made it to the shower
This could be the definition of living by yourself
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
You had me at "let me see your balls"
YOU WILL GIVE ME MASHED POTATOES OR I WILL RIP YOUR SOUL INTO 7 PIECES AND YOU WILL TURN INTO LORD VOLDEMORT
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
Jack and I got in a huge fight at 6am. He fell asleep when I was giving him head so I freaked. We were both black out so I made a memo in my phone reminding me
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