it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
And he just showed me his vera bradley wallet...
And then you told your sister how horrible of a friend I was because I couldn't get you cheese fries...
I really need to find better places to throw up. I would like to be able to use the bathroom sink the next morning for brushing my teeth
I'm so disappointed in myself I can actually taste it.
Does it taste like semen?
dude, my ass and shoulder hurt from that kayak last night... note to self: wood planks holding kayak from ceiling do not also hold up a human being
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
He was spooning with the dog when I came home. Now shes afriad to go near him. Should I ask?
Do you think we could brew coffee with beer? I'm thinking a hazelnut Guinnesspresso can only end with pure awesome.
Also I'm sorry for asking you to shave my vagina for me last night
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
She stopped me mid sex to ask if she could finish my ramen, I've found the one.
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
Randomize
