Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
It was weird. Like "Mom, Dad, here's a guy who knows my orgasm face".
You need to get over here. I think the drunks are about to sacrifice a chicken to the beer gods. Or a freshman. Stay tuned.
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
Oh thank Jesus fuck for my shitty infertile womb. Crisis averted
did you know gatorade and rum go really good together
Are you doing depressed science again
maybe
You should know two things about me,,,1) I am highly sexual and 2) I am HIGHLY competitive so you telling me about how much sex you had with the other girl makes me say "challenge accepted"... you should hydrate.
We had sex with a sexual harassment video playing in the background before his gf got there. I've hit a new low
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
When you wake up and wonder why your bleeding and it feels like you jumped into a ceiling fan, dont worry. Ill explain it all when I wake up.
To the woman who just heard me unscrew my flask in the Denny's women's bathroom at 10am: discretion isn't required but greatly appreciated.
Did you at least share?
Randomize
