dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
So, I just pissed in her shampoo bottle. Hope she enjoys a late golden shower from me.
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
It's so cute when the exchange student uses "blowjob" as a verb.
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
I told him to pick up the beer can he threw in front of the police station. So he gets out chugs whatever's left and throws it back and says ok let's go.
When she sees your dick for the first time, tell her it glows blue when orcs are close
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
Prerry sure I narrowly avoided being tazed by a swat cop last night... But on the up side, we found my purse.
I'm watching porn in spanish. Thats studying right?
I tried to settle their lesbian roommate fight by turning on Pretty Wild
Guess who just bought an ounce of pot via Paypal, and paid for it with my airline Visa card to earn miles?
Congratulations. That business degree is finally worth every penny it cost you.
i'm pretty sure you can't sue someone for "Taking a shit on my kitchen floor."
I just woke up drenched in beer, in a puddle of beer, and cuddling a bottle of tequila
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
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