Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
i told the doctor i drank a college amount of alcohol. judgemental prick
He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half?
this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
I kinda wanna eat your hands right now.
Put down the everclear and go to bed.
It's take your daughter to work day... I really shouldn't be here right now
I can't believe he let me cut his hair as stoned as I was.. I think I even cut my own hair too
The dopest dose you'll ever dose. I felt like an octopus all of thursday
Brb crying the tears of my youth
Ok. I'm gonna smoke some weed and look at some elephants without you then.
Bro you were on fire last night...like a less Irish version of Liam Neeson
My aunt asked how many piercings I had and my mom said seven and I said nine and that's how my family found out I had my nipples pierced.
Shit happens dude.
Shit doesn't just HAPPEN on the kitchen floor you asshole.
Just got my second shot
Baller. We’re going to be knee deep in strippers and coke in 10 days
Randomize
