absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
I totally just used John Mayer's lyrics to get laid.
the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
Welp just pooped in a garbage can. Guess I'm not better than you at life in any aspect.
i woke up to you and that girl going out onto the balcony naked
oh sorry man.. we went outside because we DIDN'T want to wake you
It was like something out of a fucked up fairy tale. He just crowdsurfed over to her while riding a keg, said "come sail with me", and then the crowd carried them off into the night. What.
The German just referred to my vagina as the Great Barrier Reef and that he was going to go diving in it.
I'm watching Russian dudes pole-dance. For research.
The last thing I searched on my phone was "leave in conditioner on cats." This is where my life is.
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
I'm to the point of desperation where I stare at customers penis imprints through their pants all day
I rewarded myself with Taco Bell tonight for going a full week without punching my roommates in the face or wishing bodily harm on them.
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
Randomize
