All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
I'm someone's dream girl. I'm hungover in this guy's bed wearing ONLY a Brian Westbrook jersey. Not the same I was on a date with last night.
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
cheating on your boyfriend is the best diet ever, I've barely eaten in days. The guilt is killing me
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
We left the house and she said "let's go dick hunting" theres no way last night was gonna end up well
You should make cookies and when I get home we can have a slow motion hug and eat them
As a general rule, drunkenness and gymnastics do not mix.
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
The lady that was sitting beside me thought the best way to cheer herself up was to pet and ruffle my hair while crying and telling me her problems...
There's no sexy way to moan the name Ernest. Or Ernie. This relationship is fucked
What the fuck was I thinking eating an entire tub of potato salad on acid. My stomach today bro
Randomize