It was just pointed out to me in a meeting that there is a lipstick stain on my crotch.
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
there are 10 yearolds here who keep calling me on the elbow rule!
Wait are they playing beer pong to?
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
This does no justice to the amount of paint I'm covered in or the amount of balls I'm tripping.
I just horrified a large group of people. Congrats on dating me.
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
Sometimes I envy you, when I'm not praying for your soul.
Winning pick four numbers were just 6969... if I were 18 I could've won 20,000 dollars.
I'm going to sing sad and lonely Barbra Streisand songs at the top of my lungs if you don't get here soon
She sent me a pic wearing only my batman cape. She stole my cape dude!
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
Jack and I got in a huge fight at 6am. He fell asleep when I was giving him head so I freaked. We were both black out so I made a memo in my phone reminding me
Randomize
