also, made friends with this 75 year old millionaire Tony who likes to mosh. Don't ask.
capris are just wrong
its like "what can i possible wear to make myself look short and fat? Oh I know!!"
ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
I woke him up this morning and said I have a meeting w my advisor in an hour you need to wake up, cum on my face, and take me to my car.
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
Cover your phone. Photos of streaking frat guys incoming.
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
This may be the alcohol talking, but I'm pretty sure I know Spanish now
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
Remember when we got high off our ass and you talked me into running in place then punched me in the face and said it was a wall?
Ya, you were bleeding for an hour and a half
Mom wants to know if you're coming over or if it's safe for her to take her bra off...
Randomize
