In the future we'll all be gay
is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
My dog ate my bag of weed. Thats not the easiest call to the vet to make.
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
My wife googled 'purchase vibrator.' Not sure if I should be excited or offended.
If one more "stranger" walks up to me at the bar and asks how I have been, I am going to rehab.
When you awake you'll realize that your car is missing....just know that I had it and becuz of your car I hooked up with the hot bar tender that looks like that guy from bay-watch however I parked it in a loading zone and it was towed...that sex was TOTALLY worth it love you
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
Just found a peacock feather in my car. Should I be the least bit concerned about this?
The strippers from this weekend suck at words with friends
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
I think god invented us with two hands so we can grab an ass and spank it at the same time.
So I decided to sleep with him for the first time in months so I can convince him it's his kid instead of the other guy
u would mumble something and then get unnecessarily loud and say random shit like 'id fuck the shit out of taylor hanson right now'
Randomize
