took him home. told him i would rock his world. passed out. a for effort f for follow thru
apparently it's okay for him to stick his dick in my mouth but not to let me have a can of diet pepsi for the road.
His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
dude i feel like at any given point 3/5 of that family is trying to fuck you
The story about him having a girlfriend changed real fast when he found out that I was a gymnast
There is no way I'm taking advice from somone who's idea of a balanced diet consists of vodka and lemon detox juice
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
He tied my whole arm, in its cast, to the headboard first. He mumbled something about safe, sane, and consensual?
At what point did you think the cops were actually coming to hang out with us
You cant hold me accountable for my actions when im high.
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
I want her autograph on my taint
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
You know you have a good math teacher when we're talkIng about mixture problems and no one gets it until he explains it by talking about mixing alcohol
Randomize
