I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
Slut skills are useful in every country.
I told you not to have sex with her on my futon
I didnt dude, i swear!
either that or you were eating mayo, which was the second thing i told you not to do on my futon
You were in my dream and you got the lyrics to lollipop tattooed on your chest. Don't get it, it wasnt that cool.
I seriously just caught my 15 year old little sister with a positive pregnancy test coming out of the bathroom. Honest to God.
I have a coat hanger and a baseball bat. Her choice.
I'm hiding behind a bush in mens clothing next to a ducks crossing sign. There are joggers. Please hurry.
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
He booked us a hotel at a resort in cancun for sprng break... I just wanted to get laid this weekend when i was blackout i didnt know it was gonna spiral into a mess of events like a 5 month in advance commitment
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
We picked up some guys dressed as shamrocks at taco bell. I will text you with further information.
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
so i showed up to the bars in a sombrero and a tie as a headband... so yeah, they didn't let me in
Did I fall last night?
I wouldn't call it falling as much as you tried to lay on the sidewalk and proceeded to hit it face first.
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
Randomize
