I think we should boobie trap our beer this time using duct tape, rubber bands, seran wrap, and urine. Trust me I have a plan and it will work.
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
it's 10:36pm. Do you know where your penis should be?
I'm going to join a nudist colony to win $1000. There are no down-sides to this.
I just want you to know that we eye fucked the shit out of someone who just got drafted
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
So I dropped $130 while buying shots for an army ranger, got my fake taken, almost went to jail, and came out of my black out when I was talking to the cops with a stolen detour sign in my hands.
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
Not many people can say they've been photo bombed by an antelope. I sure did.
Do me a favor and don't mention him I feel like Regina George and I just want to scream I made him
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
Omg. I definitely just got hit on by my doctor AFTER he completed my pap smear which clearly showed I was in the middle of an outbreak. What. The. Fuck.
i woke up on the floor in front of the fireplace and my last google search was "fuck sponges"
when I finally convinced you to get off the floor you looked at me wild-eyed and said "the carpet was a VAST EXPANSE OF SEA"
Randomize
