summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
dude i woke up to her making a statue of my morning wood for her sculpture class. HOW THE FUCK do you think i feel about her?
Hey guess what I got for Valentine's day? Debt and blue balls.
How long is it safe to eat only Hot Pockets and Popsicles?
We made a late night liquor run, made margaritas and bloody marys and then retreated to opposite sides of the house to drink them. Alone.
You guys make me sad
You misspelled jealous there
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
I got arrested for "public intoxication". Fuckers threw me out of the bar into public... i mean shit they have thirsty Thursdays. And I get thrown out for self serve Sundays plus a citation.
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
How drunk do you think I'll be by the time I get home?
I just watched you drink a whole glass of wine through a Twizzler. Pretty drunk.
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
I think putting on real pants was half my issue with today
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