His pickup line was "I'll eat you out"
He did it well too
i just woke up and "where the fuck is taco bell" was in my search engine...
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
End of the semester and I banged 14 freshman. I'm like my own welcome to college orientation guide.
your idea of a balenced meal is a microwave frozen burrito, a cup of ramen noodles, and a can of budlight. honestly tell me how your resolution is to lose weight,
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
So getting drunk in honor of the bomb threat is legit right?
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
one of these days i'm gonna do a sparkly magical girl transformation into snoop dogg
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
Dude, I work in two hours. Unless you can find Chris Hemsworth and convince him to have a three-way with us, I'm not getting out of bed.
my mom talks about my drinking like its a problem and yet this morning she fills me a solo cup with champagne for the shower.
I don't think getting eaten out in a smart car behind a circle-k on my break by a guy I just met classifies as social distancing, but I'm beginning to love night shift more and more.
Randomize
