I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
You'll be happy to know that I did indeed fracture my rib in a sex related injury
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
I feel like I'm full of double a batteries and cocaine.
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
Dammit labor day drinking cancelled due to 3 inch long table saw cut to palm
i think you lost all your innocence when you were caught straddling a fence in your thong & cowboy boots by the 40 year old apartment manager
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
It's Saturday night and I'm getting shitfaced alone while reading Dino porn. Wassssuuuupppp
Anyway. I unfriended all of these people like a grown up and I am never talking to them again
So do you remember the bartender that caught me when I fell off the bar 4 weeks ago? He hasn't been to work since...Woops.
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
I just broke a sweat masturbating on a Friday night. I may need a boyfriend.
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
Randomize
