summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
I have found the one flaw to the great pride I took as a guy to not have to sit down to pee...having to sneeze while peeing.
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
and i was just like oh shit i'm getting felt up by a 15 year old
No one wears that much makeup to work unless they are trying to fuck their boss, NO ONE
Cavemen vs astronauts. weapons to be determined. Who would win?
If you see my mugshot on the news tomorrow, its not what you think
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
They are fixing my bike for free, trying to smoke me out, and their kids keep hugging me.
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
i can't even hate his new girlfriend cuz she survived a fucking brain tumor. like that's just not fair.
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
Evidently I placed three booty calls at the same time...it was an ugly scene. I'm never getting that high again.
I may have just sent her dad a picture of my penis. His name's Myron, right?
I was randomly pulled aside to have my bag checked. It had 50 condoms in it.
Randomize
