So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
He's fat, has man boobs, and is uncircumsized. I feel like I won the last woman on earth prize.
But like now everytime I pee I just think... wow I had sex with him on this toilet.
I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow
may have given a homeless man 70 dollars in exchange for his sandals. so yea, i'm going as jesus for next halloween.
so... the fat chick just walked over, shook my hand, then introduced herself as "versatile". shoot me now.
Actually I think I might be dying right now so if I do you have to drink all my vodka
You're so demanding.
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
THEY HAVE BEEN GOING AT IT FOR 2 HOURS AND I HEAR THEM BANGING THIS IS BULLSHIT
If sex isn’t mentioned at least three times at the dinner table, I’m not interested...
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
There are footprints all over my windshield
You said you were making waffles...
Randomize
